I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
