Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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