The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
