You smell like a Billy Joel song
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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