it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
