party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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