Don't you send me to vm
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
