there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
