I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
you made out with another girl for some wings
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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