I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
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