i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
