So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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