hell yes lets make some ravioli
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
