New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
