so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
