who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
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