its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
