Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
