I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
