i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
