I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
ok first of all what the fuck
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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