As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
