Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
