sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
