Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
