My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
