the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
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