Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
