we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize