even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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