Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
