Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
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