Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
I touched a dick in church today
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
