just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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