I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
