i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
