so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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