the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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