i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
