Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
