dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Randomize
