But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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