stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
