can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
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