all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
