I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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