As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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