I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
