try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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