U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
