He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
